Truth Media has identified the main officer responsible for a serious attack in Melbourne today. (see attached file) An innocent 20 year-old woman was sexually assaulted by a gang of Melbourne City Council and Victoria Police Officers in Flagstaff Gardens. She was protesting against the unjust power of corporations as part of 'Occupy Melbourne'. There is no suggestion that the pig has done anything unlawful.
C'mon you guys. How were my officers supposed to know that this chick was gonna ambush them all by wearing her undies underneath? And those tentmonsters on Sunday had already scared the shit out of them. In any case, they didn't do anything wrong. I won't pre-empt the independent inquiry into the assault claims (there is no inquiry into sexual assault I might add). I have full confidence that this investigation by my Police Ethical Standards Division will come back with the right finding. Furthermore, I will have no hesitation in using my powers to dismiss any officer who has shown unsuitable character by coming up with the wrong answer.
Former drunk driver.